The Marriageable Age - Part 1

Move over the Quarter Life Crisis, that’s passé! This is a new sort of crisis I am talking about here. Often undermined, and never reported.

Every distant relative keeps asking your parents, about your marriage plans. And, all the jobless neighbors all of a sudden know some ‘well-natured’ working girl who is just by-chance of the same age-group as you are and is Single. Yes, this is what happens when you are 26 and still single. Welcome to the Mid-Twenties’ ‘Single’ Life! Most of the times, it’s the fairer sex, they say, goes through such things. But, what the poor guys have to go through is more often than not, never thought about.

Who should read this Post, and why?

• If you have been married for a couple of Years or less (You found your Love in your classmate/college-mate/office colleague etc.)– You are probably one of my ‘Just-Married’ Friends. Read on, you might not have experienced this yourself, but, it’s important you understand what other poor souls go through. Don’t you remember how we as children were always taught to appreciate that we get Milk to drink, whereas many other children of our age are deprived of it. Even though you did not like Milk as much as Pepsi/Coke, but were supposed to drink it just because we were lucky to be getting it. So, you guys need to appreciate that you are getting to drink Milk :)

• If you have been married for a couple of Years or less (and it was an arranged marriage) – You probably are the elder son in the family, whose parents were either too eager or too anxious to get started with their duties. If, that’s not the case, you probably are an exception rather than the rule. Anyways, read on just to seek comfort in the fact that you were not alone who went through all this.

• If you have been married for a few years now (1-5 years, and it was an Arranged Marriage) – You probably have went through the same phase, read it to relive your past. Come on, no matter how much one may deny, everyone, Yes you read it, EVERYONE loves nostalgia. You will hate it when it’s someone else’s but will love it when the Nostalgic story involves you.

• If you have been married for a few years, but it was a Love marriage – Notice, I did not mention the Years here. There is a reason for it, because I think love Marriages in India have suddenly seen a jump since the past few years only (now don’t throw numbers at my face, I stopped being good with them since the day I entered college). You can read the post, so that you know what your friends, now happily settled with 2 kids, probably went through, a few years back.

• If you do not fall in any of the above categories – How did you get the link to my blog? *surprised* You could not have come here through Facebook (Thanks to the ‘Share with Custom’ settings). Ok, I am kidding :D . If you do not fall in any of the above categories, you are more than 5 years older than me(I am not that bad with numbers, eh?) and you will have a Bird’s eye view of what all is going on and will see and understand the bigger picture. It will be a help if you can throw some guiding light, so you too Read On.

The phone rings – it’s that friend from school who only calls you on your Birthday. But, today is not your Birthday, so what could it be? “Why is he calling me?”, “Is he in my city, and wants to catch up? I doubt.”. You pick up the phone, and say – “Hello!” with a surprising tone. The pleasantries are exchanged, and you try to catch up with what is happening in each other’s life. Then, he tells you that he is getting married in a month. You surprisingly ask, “Abey! Tub hi shaadi kar raha hai?” (You too are getting married?). He replies from the other end, “Haan yaar! Tu bhi kar le.” (Yes! You too get married). Then suddenly it strikes you that, one by one everybody is getting married around you. What used to be a complete Bachelor’s group, is no longer a Single’s group. All the people around you are either getting engaged, or married. In Barney Stinson’s words –“Everyone I know is either getting married or Pregnant. I am just getting more Awesome”. Ok, we can debate the last line Barney said about getting more awesome.

For a moment you think, am I too late? Is this the right age for me to think about getting married and as the elders say “settle down.” Then you say to yourself, “Bah! Forget it, and let it be! Let’s enjoy the single-hood as of now.” Well, this is the easy part i.e. assuring yourself. The tough part is when the people at your home start thinking the way you think after seeing people in your friend circle settling down. They begin to get restless, they get anxious, they get tensed thinking – is our child slowly going past his ‘Marriageable age” ? This is where all the Uncles and the Aunties and the Neighbors come into the picture. And, who has to face the brunt of all this? The Poor You!

to be continued ...